'Transporter 3' review

Because sometimes you're just in the mood to see a car park on top of a moving train

By Matt Pais

Metromix
November 25, 2008

 
Critic's Rating:
3

'Transporter 3' review
Jason Statham (Credit: Magali Bragard/Lionsgate)
Transporter 3
Running time:
105 minutes
Rated:
PG-13
Cast:
Jason Statham -
Frank Martin
Natalya Rudakova -
Valentina
François Berléand -
Tarconi
Robert Knepper -
Johnson
Jeroen Krabbé -
Leonid Vasilev
See full cast
Director:
Olivier Megaton
Genre:
Action
Official Movie Web Site:
http://transporter3film.com/
Movie Trailer:
Overall User Rating:
5 (7 ratings)
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Back for another testosterone-fueled delivery, extraordinary driver Frank Martin's (Jason Statham) package this time is the passenger: fiery redhead Valentina (Natalya Rudakova), who's been kidnapped to blackmail her father, the Ukraine's head of the Environmental Protection Agency. Frank's all business as usual, but as in the original "Transporter," that can't stop things from heating up between the deliveryman and his cargo. Worth noting: Frank's employers saddle him and Valentina with bracelets that will explode if they go more than 75 feet from their car.

The buzz: Cory Yuen's "The Transporter" was tight, exciting and even witty, but Louis Leterrier's "Transporter 2" mucked it up with too much plot, awful performances from Amber Valletta and Matthew Modine, and stylized direction that slid into self-parody. (These remain Statham's best movies, though that's not saying much compared to "Death Race," "War," "London," etc.) Director Oliver Megaton takes over for episode three, which boasts the longest running time of the trilogy and, after "Quantum of Solace," is the second action film this month with environmental connections.

The verdict: That's more like it. Landing somewhere between parts one and two in the mindless, innocent fun department, "Transporter 3" becomes something that's not serious but doesn't make a joke of itself either. (The plot's not the point and that's why very little is explained—good luck figuring out what's actually at stake for the environment.) Even though Megaton gets too busy with MTV-style cutting and too cute when Frank and Valentina let work turn into play, some terrifically implausible stunts make it very easy to sit through this nonsense. "Transporter 3" is as disposable as a travel toothbrush, and an effective palate cleanser between the boredom of "Twilight" and the heavy Oscar contenders coming soon.

Did you know?
Frank informs Valentina that when hungry, it's smarter to buy a sandwich than a bottle of vodka. Needless to say, the better solution is buying both: Nothing goes together like hard liquor and corned beef.

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