'Hotel for Dogs' review

Emma Roberts and Jake T. Austin (Credit: Jaimie Trueblood/Paramount)

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Orphaned siblings Andi (Emma Roberts) and Bruce (Jake T. Austin) hate their foster parents (Lisa Kudrow, Kevin Dillon) but take solace in their fondness for pooches large and small, which they care for unofficially in an abandoned hotel. (Fortunately 11-year-old Bruce's engineering skills make him as good an inventor as Rick Moranis in "Honey I Shrunk the Kids," so the dogs can play fetch with themselves.) If the kids get caught their chances of finding a permanent home are squat, despite the best efforts of a friendly social worker (Don Cheadle).

The buzz: Based on the 1971 children's novel, this may be the most self-explanatory movie since "Snakes on a Plane." Until, say, Martin Scorsese takes a crack at it, it's very likely impossible to make a great film called "Hotel for Dogs."

The verdict: Comparatively, a movie about a hotel for hogs, logs or frogs might have had a chance. Yes, some of the dogs naturally elicit affectionate coos, and the canines are awfully good actors. (They clearly have no qualms with making out on camera. Young kids may say, "Eww," more than, "Aww.") But the repetitive, unimpressive film fully gives into inherent mediocrity by flattening the drama, turning cartoonishly mean animal collectors into the villains and leaving you distracted with the question, "How else could my kids and I have spent this hour and a half?"

Did you know? Andi and Bruce try to drum up cash by tricking pawn shop owners into buying cell phone boxes filled with rocks, not phones, for $20. Here's hoping "Rock in a Box" either becomes a holiday gift fad or a "SNL" digital short.

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